You're getting hit with accusation -- the warning signs

Warning sign #1: The conversation centers around compliance -- getting you yield to an alleged standard of thought or behavior of some sort. This could be compliance to church standards of "holiness" or to corporate standards that determine how things have always been done. Or, this could be unspoken expectations one picks up from one's family of origin and carries into the job, the marriage, the parenting.  Or, you may have adopted a more healthy set of expections, but your family hasn't. 

Warning sign #2: The accuser needs to be right-- at the expense of the relationship.

Warning sign #3: Spiritual arrogance masquerading as "love." ("I'm only saying this because I love you and want what's best for you.") Hmmm...that's not what I'm picking up here...

Warning sign #4: Fight or flight? You either want to fight or run. You're wounded and want to place as much distance between you and your accuser as possible, but you don't want them to get away with it, either.  Paralysis?  Retaliation?  "Feeling overwhelmed....loosing my spiritual footing."

What about you? What have you experienced when you've been under accusation's sting?